Phoebe is in Doggy Heaven.

Phoebe

Age 15, ~1998 - April 16, 2013

"Phoebe was my moon,and I her Saturn;In Constant orbit,always being drawn closer by my gravity."

Phoebe with Mr. Squeeky(Her #1 Favorite Toy).

Nickname: Pheebs,Little Girl,Baby

The year was 1999;I had gone thru alot in the previous 2 years..........One day in January of that year I was looking at classified ads for cars in the local paper,and somehow I ended up on the 'Lost Pets' section....I noticed one ad in particular for a 'Yorkie Mix' that had been found wandering in a busy section of town with no collar or tags....For some strange reason I was compelled to call the phone number,a woman who was a foster mother with the local 'Lost Pet Hotline' answered and said the ad had been running in 2-3 different local publications;But,they had had no responses and the ads were do to expire in 3 days......The lady that I spoke with asked if I would be interested if nobody called by the deadline,and I told her 'Yes'......3 days later she called me back to inform me that they had no responses,and would I be willing to let her bring the dog over for me to see/meet that evening......I told her 'Sure';......She arrived with the dog about 2 hours later,and brought her into the house.....The little dog didn't exactly look like a 'Yorkie' but some kind of 'Terrier Mix',but I was more concerned with the fact the dog was growling,and kept her tail tucked between her legs.....Generally she didn't seem very friendly!......While all of this was going on the lady told me what she knew about the dogs mannerisms: She didn't seem to like men,she took more readily to women & children(possibly had been abused by a male?),seemed to be afraid of brooms,belts,coat-hangers,and if you walked too close she acted like you were going to kick her........After we were done talking;The dog still didn't want anything to do with me,but she suggested leaving the dog with me overnight,or for 2-3 days to see how we got along.......Obviously,I was a little apprehsive but eventually agreed to a 'trail period'(what could it hurt?)....With that the lady left and I tried to talk soothingly to the dog,and let her know I meant no harm......She still growled,and cowered in the corner of the room....After about 30 minutes of trying to be her 'friend' I made the decision to just ignore her and go on about my own household business,she was still scared & afraid.....I decided shortly after to lay on the floor,with my head & eyes facing away from her,and my hands out to my side palms down......When I did this she slowly,and cautiously came over to me to investigate.....I stayed still,and 'played dead';All of a sudden she took her nose and nudged my hand....So,I stroked her under her chin for a few seconds and then stopped!....When I stopped she nudged my hand again;This time I did it for a little bit longer before I stopped again......She nudged me again!...This time I just kept scratching under her chin,then she layed down beside me and rolled over wanting me to scratch her belly(which I did!)...We layed there for about 30 minutes,then I got up and she followed me ever since then.......She was very smart,as I would soon discover;I showed her where the door was a took her outside in the backyard....She never had to be told again where the door was!......That night she slept beside me in my bed,little did I know she would never leave my side again.....We enjoyed many good years of love and companionship with each other after that first day....Girlfriends would come & go,and Phoebe always made sure to let them know where 'her' spot was on the sofa & even the bed!.......Even after the relationship ended for whatever reason Phoebe was always there for me.........In June of 2011 I was doing a morning 'belly rub' in bed with her and I felt a small little lump by one of her lower 'teets' less than the size of a pea......This sounded an alarm in me,and I called as soon as the vets office opened that morning;The vet said it was a small tumor,and suggested surgery & biopsy....I didn't argue at all;He told me I was such a good owner to catch it this early.......After the surgery they sent the mass off for testing;It came back positive for cancer,but he said they most likely got to it early enough to get all of it(crisis averted,whew!)......About six months later,during one of many 'belly rubs' of the day I again noticed a small lump on one of the other 'teets'....Off to the vet again!...Result,same thing(surgery biopsy)-POSITIVE!...........This happened on different teets at different times over the next year....Each time,same protocol(sugery/biopsy/POSITIVE).....Finally in July of 2012;I noticed it on several spots around the mammary glands;So I took her to the vet for that....This time he said in order to do this radical surgery I would need to travel to San Antonio to South Texas Veterinary Specialists because this was beyond his comfort zone and facilities.......So we arranged to make the pilgrimage to San Antonio;When we finally saw the specialist vet in S.A. he said he could definately do the surgery,but testing showed it had metasticized into the lymphatic system and she probably only had 2-6 months even with surgery & chemo......He also said without either,she only had about 2 months!....I was DEVESTATED!!!!!!......But,I eventually decided to do whatever I could to give my 'child' as long on Earth as I could......Also,to keep her comfortable and having quality of life..........For the next 7 months we made monthly trips up STVS in SA for IV chemo treatments and alternating oral chemo 2 weeks after IV......She responded very well in the begining slowing the growth of the cancer;I was under no illusion of remision,they made sure to 'tell me like it is'......Eventually,the chemo protocol started having less & less effect in slowing the cancer growth.......Finally near the end Feb. 2013,the chemo totally stopped working.....They asked me if I was willing to try an experimental(for her type cancer)treatment using Palladia(of course I said 'Yes')......So,the first week of March I started the Palladia;That Wed. I gave her the first dose,that Fri. I gave her the 2nd dose,that Sun. I was supposed to give her the 3rd dose,but before it was time to give her the Sun. dose she started becoming lethargic,and had reddish loose stool,and just wanted to lay down.....If she did get up,she was unsteady on her feet,and didn't eat or drink.....I was worried enough to call the local vet;The vet said to bring her in ASAP.....Upon examination,he said it was definately side effects from Palladia,and to stop giving it to her immediately(she almost died from it!)......So since Palladia was a last resort there was no option left.......For almost 6 weeks she was still a happy & loving little dog,and then one night she started having slightly labored breathing,and didn't eat her supper that night,when we went to bed she was still doing it only a little worse...This continued all night(I know because I didn't sleep,and neither did she).....By,morning she could barely breathe so I took in the the vet as early as possible(8am)....When the vet came in to examine her and listened to her chest he said she was suffering and it was time to help her.........He prepared a sedative injection and administered it first,and said to allow 5 mins for it to relax her,and he would return with the other injection(Potassium Chloride?) to stop her heart........I sat there by her side told her how much I loved her as I stroked her softly,after about 3 mins I noticed she stopped breathing.......I called out for the vet and he rushed in and listened for a heartbeat......There was none;He said she was in such a weak condition even the sedative had been enough,but he went ahead and gave her the 2nd injection just to be sure........I carried her lifeless body out to the truck(where she had ridden so many times)and drove home to await the man from the cremation service..........I got home and sat there and cried like I have never cried in my life,and softly stroked her lifeless body for a hour until he showed up,and I said 'Good-bye' to her for the last time.....In less than 24 hours,he returned with her urn w/nameplate,certificate of cremation,and her paw prints in clay......At the time I am typing this it has been 6 weeks today since she passed;I really don't know if there is a Heaven or Hell........But,of all the things I hope;I hope there is a place where I can someday see her furry face once again.........Because she wasn't just a dog to me........In many ways she was my wife,my daughter,my best friend,and my world..........Rest In Peace-Little Girl,Your Daddy Loves & Misses You So Much!