Pet Peeves

It’s dinner-time NOW, so where’s the REAL food?
‘Scuse me, "master", I don’t wish to seem rude,
But that stuff in my dish— that’s not for ME!
Why, that’s ANIMAL chow; I’m family!

I see what you’re having— I’ll have that too.
It smells sssooo yummy, you KNOW what I’ll do:
I’ll watch each move— from your plate— to your lips.
I’ll dash right over to lick up the drips.
A pitiful sight, you’ll have to give in—
So give it to me now, you know I’ll win.

Oh thank you, that’s great. I love you the most.
I think I’ll have another slice of roast!
And— one tiny thing more— you’re in MY chair;
I can’t take my nap unless I sleep there!
Sit on the sofa— that’ll be YOUR spot;
It’s comfy there, too. You’ll like it a lot.

I don’t F-E-E-L like moving; step over please.
And buy some more spray, I think WE’VE got fleas!
There, that’s much better. Why, you hardly moaned:
You’re the best "owner" that I ever owned.

Joann Cencula
9 May 1985